CAUSE I LIKE CHAMPAGNE MOM, OK!?

Scene: At the grocery store, buying random necessities for the week.

Mom: Why are you buying champagne?

Me: Cause I like it.

Mom: Are you having a party? Cause we should really tidy the house before then.

Me: No, I’m not.

Mom: Well, then who is going to drink the champagne?

Me: Me.

Mom: All by yourself?

Me: Yes.

Mom: So you’re not having anyone over at all. It will JUST be you?

Me: YES MOM, I AM GOING TO DRINK ALL THE CHAMPAGNE ALL BY MYSELF. I’VE DONE IT BEFORE AND I’LL DO IT AGAIN.

End scene.