CAUSE I LIKE CHAMPAGNE MOM, OK!?

Scene: At the grocery store, buying random necessities for the week.

Mom: Why are you buying champagne?

Me: Cause I like it.

Mom: Are you having a party? Cause we should really tidy the house before then.

Me: No, I’m not.

Mom: Well, then who is going to drink the champagne?

Me: Me.

Mom: All by yourself?

Me: Yes.

Mom: So you’re not having anyone over at all. It will JUST be you?

Me: YES MOM, I AM GOING TO DRINK ALL THE CHAMPAGNE ALL BY MYSELF. I’VE DONE IT BEFORE AND I’LL DO IT AGAIN.

End scene.

 

Things I Do Instead of Making a Sexy Video

1. admire new boots
2. text pics of new boots to bff
3. watch videos about jenna marbles procrastinating
4. text bff and tell bff how i am procrastinating
5. look shit up on youporn.
6. find best pump up song ever
7. get distracted by suggested songs on youtube
8. watch more jenna marbles
9. change outfit
10. jump on bed
11. get cuppies to jump on bed
12. run around the house pretending to be a dog with cuppies
13. sit down on couch to knit
14. turn on netflix
15. completely forget that i’m supposed to be making a sexy video
16. go back to youporn
17. get horny
18. decide to make a video!!!
19. remember that’s what i was supposed to be doing all along.
20. actually make the video
I think I should make a youtube out of this.